Mine!

For about a month or so pha has been doing some new, weird things. He is dabbling with lots of thick liquids, wooden and plastic thingamajigs and odd furniture. As a born supervisor I have to keep an eye on all this. Pha won't let me sniff the thick liquids so I just sit nearby and watch. Well, I doze off most of the time. Anyway pha has this brown footstool on which he puts the white, folding contraption. When he takes a break, he often places the thing on his belly and stares at it. I have tried sharing the silly human's tummy with it but I deserve more attention. Currently I am working on annexing the brown footstool. Pha isn't happy about this as when I curl and sprawl there is little to no space left for the white contraption. He has tried alternating it with me between the footstool and his belly. Nothing doing. Feline code is simple, anything you have is ours and we don't share.

Skyence (cee be damned)

I am a genius(duh!). I have discovered an entirely new creature. My research shows there is only one in this entire planet. It is four-legged and has razor-sharp claws. It likes bugging other, nicer creatures during their nature-calls. It prefers quiet, dark and cool places. It naps 28 hours a day. Its other behaviour, which gave it its name, is to stay around, on and near pha way too darn friggin' long. Its called a phaHog(var. pha-hog). The over-protective and territorial attitude inhibits sis, I mean phaHog, from making new friends or even keeping the old ones. You try slapping your buddy using the toilet and see how he or she likes it. The phaHog likes to have fish, chicken or goat kibbles and crunchy treats in its diet. It eats VERY slow thus letting ex-pals have seconds. I suppose it evens out the swatting-ambushes...nah, it doesn't. Did I tell you its ugly too? And fat?!

Please let me use the litter-box in peace.